Deacon Dr. Fresh Wine Newsletter

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Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

World's Lurchest Wine Writer - The Gangsta of the Grape - The Sultan of Shiraz - The Buccaneer of Burgundy - The Prince of Pinot Noir - Yellow Tail's Bane - Locus of the Ladies' Focus - Wielder of the trousered Hammer of Thor - I have arrived to rescue the wine world from overly-serious, rigid, deconstructionist, rooster juice peckerwoods who'd never dream of gettin' a tattoo or crackin' a smile. I am without a doubt, the smartest, funniest and toughest sumbitch in the entire wine industry. And I aint goin' away. All disputes will be settled bare-knuckled in the Octagon. You heard me. Oh, and by the way...Bite me crank!

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

The Deacon Reviews "Beulah Land" - All Mojo and no Mofo!

Greetings to my Homeys, Hos, Friends, Neighbours and all you Peckerwood Mofo Crackerjank Dix who tune in just to see what the Deacon's gonna say next, and a special "Yo Wassup?" to Rozeen in San Diego who's gonna be joinin' us as our Kalifornia Konnexion, just as soon as his scrotum heals from climbin' that barbed-wire fence around a certain electronics store...
Now over the months that have been largely marked by your humble Deacon's stratispheric rise in the spotlite of the wine industry, you've read my reviews of wines and wineries, restaurants and events, sommeliers and assorted swine. Well today we be reviewin' our first CD! My Legion of Lurch know that the Deacon only brings quality to the table, whether it's a "not to be missed" wine or the latest and greatest way to crank a human neck. Well trust me in this: You gotta check out this music...
I'm referrin' to the CD "Beulah Land". Now to those of you monkey-peckers who need an ed-joo-kayshun, "Beulah" is Hebrew for "Married", but you really gots to be up on your Blake and Milton to truly grasp the concept. (So basically, the Deacon gets it, but you don't.) This CD has a true wine konnexion, being the product of the extremely fertile brain of Ace Sommelier Peter Boyd. Now whether or not you like blues (and if you don't, you might as well wear a sign saying "Hello there! I'm a Peckerwood Bag-Scratch Mofo!"), I predict you'll love this lurch CD!
Many of you know your humble Deacon to be a Johnny Winter/Eric Clapton/Jimmy Page/SRV bluesboy from way back, and I can tell the real-deal. And this is the real-deal, Jack. Boyd may be Toronto born and Upper Canada College stock, but he's got Mississippi River water in his veins! This is a white boy as you can see from his picture, but he's been to the crossroads and sold his soul to the Devil! The record starts strong, with the handclap percussion and classic resonator track "Been to the Well". This has the muddy fingerprints of the Delta all over it and is real swampy:
Well, now, I've been to the well, now
Four times
I got an empty bucket at the end of the
Just looking at the bottom...Lord, I'm dry
So damn dehydrated I can't even cry
Well, I've got a sense that I'm just Love's
A long way back to the cistern
I ought to get me a mule

The second track brings in the George Clinton funk a bit and is not to my taste, but track 4 "If I Even Wake" is truly beautiful with vocals as forward as the fruit in an Oz Shiraz. I especially enjoyed track 5 "Southbound" which is an up-tempo railroad-style blues with classic train-whistle harmonica and a chugging tempo that goes real lurch with the clean guitar stylings.

The bottom line is: there's somethin' for every blues lover on this record, from the plodding deliberation of "The Sun is Going Down Again" with it's powerful anti-racist lyrics, to the blistering Charlie Musslewhite style blues-harp on the raunchy "Separation Blues". This is a record that blues fans will love and those new to the art form will grow to love very quickly. You can easily set it on in the background or take a meditative drive with a bottle of Shiraz.

You can pick up "Beulah Land" at Sam's downtown or Soundscapes on College Street. Get off your butt and buy this record and support a Canadian talent.

Nice work Peter. The Deacon approves. Quit your day job.

This is where you belong...

You heard me.

Deacon Dr. Fresh

More current than Rolling Stone


Blogger Miss Mixen said...

Dear Dr. Deacon, sir!
Excellent choice on reviewing Beulah Land. Having heard the CD myself I was put in mind of an East Coast Harry Manx, whatever!
This is the best wine review going, keep up the lurch!!!
Miss M

4:08 PM  
Blogger Deacon Dr. Fresh said...

Thanks homegirl! The ladies always lub the Deacon.

Keepin' you safe from the monkeypeckers

1:51 PM  

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