Deacon Dr. Fresh Wine Newsletter

A Wine Newsletter With An Edge - Definitely NOT your typical white bread, mofo, cracker, peckerwood, jank, peckercracker wine newsletter! If this info is too advanced for you, check out my other newsletter: Wine for Dix at

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Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

World's Lurchest Wine Writer - The Gangsta of the Grape - The Sultan of Shiraz - The Buccaneer of Burgundy - The Prince of Pinot Noir - Yellow Tail's Bane - Locus of the Ladies' Focus - Wielder of the trousered Hammer of Thor - I have arrived to rescue the wine world from overly-serious, rigid, deconstructionist, rooster juice peckerwoods who'd never dream of gettin' a tattoo or crackin' a smile. I am without a doubt, the smartest, funniest and toughest sumbitch in the entire wine industry. And I aint goin' away. All disputes will be settled bare-knuckled in the Octagon. You heard me. Oh, and by the way...Bite me crank!

Saturday, June 30, 2007

The Deacon's fave Restaurants on the Road!

Greetings food and wine lovers everywhere!

Rejoice! The Deacon is in the frickin' house!

Today we be rappin' 'bout food but let's get this out of the way first:

A special "Hail-fellow-well-met" to all of you chainsaw wieldin', deer shootin', jet-ski ridin', ATV drivin', wilderness destroyin', blank-faced DIX who continue to piss me off royally!

Bite my fishing rod!

Ok. The pleasantries are out of the way, so let's get reviewin' a couple of restaurants for y'all...

First of all, I'm takin' you to Stratford Ontario, arguably the home of the greatest annual Shakespearean festival outside of England (Which is where Shakespeare was born, for all you readers in Keswick!) Well, the Deaconess and your humble Deacon made the yearly pilgrimage to the town of Stratford, this time to see the ever brilliant Brian Bedford as King Lear. Now this is a tragedy, which means you don't laugh a hell of a lot, but do get to see people get dissed and blinded and there's a lot of innocent death and pointless destruction that leaves you wantin' to get back to Scarlem where things are more calm and the violence is at least predictable. King Lear is a frickin' nut bar and Bedford plays him superbly; so well in fact that I started to believe Bedford had actually gone nutz and I was this close to jumpin' on stage and shakin' some sense into the cracker! Well we knew it would be heavy, so we axed your Deacon's mentor, Billy Munnelly, where to go eat, because Billy used to be a restaurateur (yes, that's spelled correctly) and he used to live in Stratford too. So Billy directs us to a very lurch establishment called Down the Street. Surprisingly, when we went to look for it, it was actually down the street too! Amazing how these labels sometimes trigger synchronicity. That's why I never eat in a restaurant called The Vomit Bucket or The Outhouse. If syncronicity kicks in, you're royally screwed.

Now this is a really lurch little place. We made sure we had reservations, because we wanted to eat early enough to make it to King Lear without being rushed and the place fills up at showtime. The owner, the lovely Susan Dunfield gave us a great table and made us feel really at home, all because we knew Billy, although I suspect everyone gets treated real well. We opted for calamari fritos with chipotle lime mayonaisse, and the tempura shrimp cocktail with a mango salsa, both of which were to die for, especially with the Cave Spring Riesling I ordered. I followed with the oven roasted chicken breast (perfectly cooked) and the Deaconess had the special, which I can't really remember, other than it involved shrimp and scallops and was also highly lurch! I had followed the Cave Spring Riesling with a buttery chardonnay that seems to have dropped through the crax in my memory... You gotta check this place out! The service was excellent and the wait staff were attentive and very personable too. I'd eat there anytime, and plan to make it a regular part of my yearly Stratford excursion. Tell them Billy AND the Deacon sent you...

The next place I wanna tug on your coat-tails about, is Mad Michael's, seen in the above picture. Now don't worry. The synchronicity doesn't kick in here. You're not gonna be enjoyin' your lunch and suddenly notice the chef runnin' at you with a machete. Michael White is a highly lurch dude who's done it all. He's managed rock bands and acted as a booking agent for a lot of acts I could tell you about. But now he's up in Wyebridge Ontario smokin' what may be the best frickin' ribs you'll ever eat! You won't believe this place. Mad Michael's is an historic property that goes back to the 1800's, and it's right next door to Group of Seven artist, Frank Johnston's historic house. What makes Mad Michael's so lurch is they make everything from scratch, including the barbecue sauce, breads, cakes, pies, and even the mustard! Where the hell do they find the time? I can just about manage to make coffee and ignite the propane barbecue...Michael has an outdoor tree-house kitchen where he can smoke 800 lbs. of meat at once. The result is beef and pork that fall off the bone, but without a hint of dryness. You can also shop around for artisan goods and explore their full-size teepee, also built from scratch, on the bank of the Wye River. I love this place and you will too! They aren't licenced yet, but their application is in process and I'm hoping to design the first Deacon Wine List in Ontario!

If you're up in the Orr Lake / Midland area, go visit Michael and Kay White. Tell them the Deacon sent you.

You heard me.

Deacon Dr. Fresh

Always lookin' for and supportin' kwality...


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