Deacon Dr. Fresh Wine Newsletter

A Wine Newsletter With An Edge - Definitely NOT your typical white bread, mofo, cracker, peckerwood, jank, peckercracker wine newsletter! If this info is too advanced for you, check out my other newsletter: Wine for Dix at

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Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

World's Lurchest Wine Writer - The Gangsta of the Grape - The Sultan of Shiraz - The Buccaneer of Burgundy - The Prince of Pinot Noir - Yellow Tail's Bane - Locus of the Ladies' Focus - Wielder of the trousered Hammer of Thor - I have arrived to rescue the wine world from overly-serious, rigid, deconstructionist, rooster juice peckerwoods who'd never dream of gettin' a tattoo or crackin' a smile. I am without a doubt, the smartest, funniest and toughest sumbitch in the entire wine industry. And I aint goin' away. All disputes will be settled bare-knuckled in the Octagon. You heard me. Oh, and by the way...Bite me crank!

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Deacon to Host Wine Awards!

Yo Homeys, Brothers and Wiggahs!


Yes, you read that headline right! Your humble Deacon is about to make a rare public appearance par excellence!

But first, here's the mandatory greetin' to all you revisionist, neo-con, backstabbin', rocket launchin', flag wavin', third world exploitin', CNN believin', owl-worshippin' DIX who refuse to take the red pill, but keep comin' back and still can't figure me out...

Bite me Crank, Matey!

So here we go...

Over the last year and a half since your humble Deacon, the Doctor of Kool, the Gangsta of the Grape, the Buccaneer of Burgundy, began postin' these rich ramblin's, many of my homeys have written and axed me to make a public appearance. Well it's happenin'! I'm finally given the go-ahead, now the negotiations are completed, and can bring y'all up to speed on the upcomin' festivities...Your humble Deacon will be the official Host of the prestigious Ontario Wine Awards Gala on April 21st, when the Black Freighter slips out of its mooring at Queen's Quay under cover of darkness, and sails to the dock behind the luxurious Queen's Landing Hotel, Niagara on the Lake. Together with the Dean of Wine, Tony Aspler, yours truly'll be bringin' some Style and Freshness to this kick-ass eeeevent! Everyone who's anyone's gonna be in attendance, one of the first tickets purchased by my homey, hypnotist Mike Mandel, who's longed to see the Deacon in action for a long time.

So make a point of attendin'! You can stay over at Queen's Landing and party with His Excellency the Deacon, well into the night. (Perhaps me and Johnny Szabo will go into town and do some neck-crankin' and bag rippin'! It's gonna be that kind of night!)

So book your ticket now cause they're goin' fast! Take your ho for an evenin' out - the ladies all lub the Deacon!

Here's how y'all get tickets: Call Sandy Kurbis 416-398-3335

You heard me...

Deacon Dr. Fresh
Finally gainin' the rich prestige he deserves


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