Deacon Dr. Fresh Wine Newsletter

A Wine Newsletter With An Edge - Definitely NOT your typical white bread, mofo, cracker, peckerwood, jank, peckercracker wine newsletter! If this info is too advanced for you, check out my other newsletter: Wine for Dix at

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Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

World's Lurchest Wine Writer - The Gangsta of the Grape - The Sultan of Shiraz - The Buccaneer of Burgundy - The Prince of Pinot Noir - Yellow Tail's Bane - Locus of the Ladies' Focus - Wielder of the trousered Hammer of Thor - I have arrived to rescue the wine world from overly-serious, rigid, deconstructionist, rooster juice peckerwoods who'd never dream of gettin' a tattoo or crackin' a smile. I am without a doubt, the smartest, funniest and toughest sumbitch in the entire wine industry. And I aint goin' away. All disputes will be settled bare-knuckled in the Octagon. You heard me. Oh, and by the way...Bite me crank!

Friday, January 27, 2006

The Deacon and the Canadian Dean of Wine Finally Meet!

Greetings Homeys, Homettes and Crackerwaters! Your humble Deacon is sittin' here on a Friday night with a glass of white chocolate liqueur, bringin' y'all up to speed on my latest ramblin's and interestin' news, and in this case it's another interview with a wine heavyweight.
Tony Aspler has tasted about 150,000 different wines, and that's probably a conservative estimate. If that figure seems impossible, realize it's based on about 5,000 wines per year for 30 years! I know what you're thinkin': How do I get that mofo's job?!?! Well the fact that he's still up and around means his liver should be on display at the Smithsonian between Einstein's brain and Dillinger's penis !
Tonight your humble Deacon made the trip uptown from Scarlem to the beautiful home of Tony Aspler and his wife, Deborah. The street being full, I parked on his lawn, which probably wouldn't have been a problem if I'd found the correct house. Once my ride was properly situated, I was met at the door by the man himself, who ushered me in where I was immediately accosted by his beautiful Wheaten Terrier, Pinot. As a former Bull Terrier owner, dogs hold no terror for the Deacon. Pinot sensed a kindred spirit, and leaped, danced and gently bit me for several minutes as Tony shouted while progressively dropping his voice several octaves which eventually calmed her down. We headed immediately to a pleasant sitting-room, already prepped with glasses, bread and cheeses. Within a minute, Tony was already opening a bottle of wine; or at least attempting to, as the screw-cap spun around without efffect. Your humble Deacon possesses the "hands of death" however, and was able to crack the code and open the muh-fuh in about 2 seconds flat. We sat down to discuss life and enjoy the spread. The wine was a Pinot Noir, as was immediately discernable from the colour and nose. It was truly exceptional, and turned out to be an Ontario wine by Norman Hardie of Prince Edward County, made entirely from Niagara grapes. (The 2005 will be entirely local grapes) This is an amazing wine! It's both gentle and assertive at the same time, if such a thing is possible, and the finish is quite long for a Pinot. This was liquid velvet! You gotta watch out for this winemaker. It was extremely hard for your Deacon to accept that this was an Ontario wine. I kept thinkin' that Mr. Aspler was settin' me up for some elaborate joke. The label's discreet and simple, with Mr. Hardie's signature on a classic Burgundian bottle. It was great with the cheese and bread and I found myself wondering what it would be like with a roast turkey dinner...Fantastic, I'm sure.
Tony was a gracious host. For a man who's done it all in the wine industry, I found him to be very friendly and approachable. We discussed his varied and stellar career in broadcasting, writing, evaluating wines, travel, etc., etc. Then his stylish wife Deborah arrived, and we talked about everything from the Enneagram system of personality, (your Deacon's type 8) to hypnosis and warts, to what's the best sparkling wine for the dollar. It turns out that like the Deacon and Deaconess, Tony's desert island wine is Champagne - provided there's a good fridge. Then Deborah and the Deacon got into literature and found they had a favourite book in common: The Shadow of the Wind. (If you don't know why we like it so much, then turn off the TV and read it.) Tony capped the evening off by giving the Deacon specially autographed copies of two of his books, which I'll be tellin' y'all about in a future issue.
We said goodbye at the door, and I headed out to Starbucks to pick up a couple of lbs. of the dark stuff. As I switched on the usual AC/DC for the ride back to Scarlem, I passed Tony and Deborah, walking Pinot who was wrapped in her doggy-coat for her evening walk, and they smiled and waved.
Thanks a lot to Tony and Deborah for allowing the Deacon into their personal space!
Lookin' forward to hangin' with you again...
Check out Tony Aspler's excellent and informative website at:
You heard me.
Deacon Dr. Fresh
Opener of Locked-Bottles and Friend of Wheaten Terriers Everywhere


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